Tag: bible-study

Riddle Me This…

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Judges Chapter 14

Samson is all grown up and looking for love. He sees a Philistine woman while he’s in Timnah and wants her. So he runs back to mom and dad and tells them to get her for him, like when a child wants a toy. We learn that this is part of some scheme to act against the Philistines. What happens next is best left up to the text itself.

5Then Samson went down with his father and mother to Timnah. When he came to the vineyards of Timnah, suddenly a young lion roared at him. 6The spirit of the Lord rushed on him, and he tore the lion apart barehanded as one might tear apart a kid. But he did not tell his father or his mother what he had done.

Brettler, Marc; Newsom, Carol; Perkins, Pheme. The New Oxford Annotated Bible with Apocrypha: New Revised Standard Version (p. 385). Oxford University Press. Kindle Edition.

Samson has some pent up aggression, doesn’t he? Anyway, he talked to the woman and was digging her, so he married her after some unspecified period of time. On his way to marry her, he came across the lion carcass and bees had taken it over and he found honey inside. So, he scraped it out and ate it and gave some to his father, but he never told him where it came from.

Samson had a feast as a celebration of his nuptials to this unnamed woman. Thirty people joined him for the feast and then he proceeded to give them a riddle.

12Samson said to them, “Let me now put a riddle to you. If you can explain it to me within the seven days of the feast, and find it out, then I will give you thirty linen garments and thirty festal garments. 13But if you cannot explain it to me, then you shall give me thirty linen garments and thirty festal garments.” So they said to him, “Ask your riddle; let us hear it.” 14He said to them,

“Out of the eater came something to eat.

Out of the strong came something sweet.”

Brettler, Marc; Newsom, Carol; Perkins, Pheme. The New Oxford Annotated Bible with Apocrypha: New Revised Standard Version (p. 385). Oxford University Press. Kindle Edition.

Naturally, this riddle is only answerable by Samson since it’s about the honey coming from the lion’s carcass. The companions ask Samson’s wife to get the answer from him and tell them. So she nags him for the entire feast until on the last day he tells her. And then she tells her people.

18The men of the town said to him on the seventh day before the sun went down,

“What is sweeter than honey?

What is stronger than a lion?”

And he said to them,

“If you had not plowed with my heifer,

you would not have found out my riddle.”

Brettler, Marc; Newsom, Carol; Perkins, Pheme. The New Oxford Annotated Bible with Apocrypha: New Revised Standard Version (p. 386). Oxford University Press. Kindle Edition.

There seems to be some innuendo going on here. I mean, did he just call his wife a heifer? Anyway, since he lost the game, he went to Ashkelon and killed thirty men for their garments. Then Samson went to his father’s house and gave his wife to his best man because she betrayed him, apparently.

Apologies for the many quoted verses, but it’s best to let the text do the talking. Obviously, we’re working toward the Leonard Cohen finale here, but that won’t be for another couple chapters.

She’s Having A Baby

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Judges Chapter 13

We’re starting off in the usual way, what with the evil things and Philistines for forty years. This book is way too repetitive

We’re introduced to a man from Zorah, whose name is Manoah, but we never find out his wife’s name, even though this chapter is primarily about her. Anyway, she’s barren, but an angel of God comes to her to tell her that she’s going to conceive and bear a son. She’s instructed not to drink alcohol, eat anything unclean, or shave or even cut her hair. This is because he’s going to be a nazirite. He will deliver Israel from the Philistines.

A couple things here, she is not a virgin, so this isn’t an immaculate conception. Also, it’s good health advice to avoid alcohol during pregnancy. However, she shouldn’t cut her hair because he will inherit cut hair reminds of the striped stick in front of mating cattle from Genesis.

After talking to the angel again, Manoah makes a burnt offering to the Lord.

17Then Manoah said to the angel of the Lord, “What is your name, so tnazirhat we may honor you when your words come true?” 18But the angel of the Lord said to him, “Why do you ask my name? It is too wonderful.”

19So Manoah took the kid with the grain offering, and offered it on the rock to the Lord, to him who works wonders.

Brettler, Marc; Newsom, Carol; Perkins, Pheme. The New Oxford Annotated Bible with Apocrypha: New Revised Standard Version (p. 384). Oxford University Press. Kindle Edition.

The annotation points to the wordplay here, “wonderful” and “one who works wonders”. As I mentioned in my judges 12 post, I’m looking into humor in the Bible and I feel like maybe this is an example. No, it’s not “haha funny” but I can imagine an early reader getting a chuckle out of this exchange.

The couple realizes only then that this was an angel of God. Manoah then wonders if they will now die because they’ve see the face of God, but the level-headed wife points out that be accepted their offering and said all that other stuff. The wife gave birth to Samson.

This Chapter Turned Stabby

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Judges Chapter 12

After Jephthah sacrificed his daughter, the Ephraimites were none too happy with him, so they told him so. After all, it was the second time now that they were excluded from the battlefield. Apparently they didn’t answer the call fast enough or something. Well, this turned a bit stabby, I would say.

5Then the Gileadites took the fords of the Jordan against the Ephraimites. Whenever one of the fugitives of Ephraim said, “Let me go over,” the men of Gilead would say to him, “Are you an Ephraimite?” When he said, “No,” 6they said to him, “Then say Shibboleth,” and he said, “Sibboleth,” for he could not pronounce it right. Then they seized him and killed him at the fords of the Jordan. Forty‐two thousand of the Ephraimites fell at that time.

Brettler, Marc; Newsom, Carol; Perkins, Pheme. The New Oxford Annotated Bible with Apocrypha: New Revised Standard Version (p. 383). Oxford University Press. Kindle Edition.

After Jephthah judged Israel for six years, he died and was buried at Gilead. He was followed by Ibzan who had thirty sons and thirty daughters who, if I read this accurately, he traded to another clan for thirty girls for his sons. This sounds like a movie, but with fewer brides and brothers. Then Elon (not that one) judged and died. Then Abdon ruled and…

14He had forty sons and thirty grandsons, who rode on seventy donkeys; he judged Israel eight years.

Brettler, Marc; Newsom, Carol; Perkins, Pheme. The New Oxford Annotated Bible with Apocrypha: New Revised Standard Version (p. 383). Oxford University Press. Kindle Edition.

Somehow I picture all these sons and grandsons on donkeys 24/7, never dismounting and walking in lockstep. I am looking at articles about humor in the Bible, because there’s has to be some in here, although it’s probably only funny if you were there. Anyway, that’s all for Chapter 12. The next few chapters deal with one of the more famous characters in this book…Hallelujah!

He Wasn’t Killed By A Woman

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Judges Chapter 9

We now meet Abimelech, son of Jerubbaal. He’s…not very nice to say the least. He went to his mother’s clan (she was the concubine of Jerubbaal) and basically got anointed king by them.

4They gave him seventy pieces of silver out of the temple of Baal‐berith with which Abimelech hired worthless and reckless fellows, who followed him. 5He went to his father’s house at Ophrah, and killed his brothers the sons of Jerubbaal, seventy men, on one stone; but Jotham, the youngest son of Jerubbaal, survived, for he hid himself.

Brettler, Marc; Newsom, Carol; Perkins, Pheme. The New Oxford Annotated Bible with Apocrypha: New Revised Standard Version (p. 377). Oxford University Press. Kindle Edition.

I found the footnote fascinating as it references Cain and Abel from way back:

Abimelech kills on a butchering stone in order to dispose of the blood before it soaks into the ground (see Gen 4.10), seeking to avoid divine retribution.

Brettler, Marc; Newsom, Carol; Perkins, Pheme. The New Oxford Annotated Bible with Apocrypha: New Revised Standard Version (p. 396). Oxford University Press. Kindle Edition.

The lords of Shechem all got together and made Abimelech king. When Jotham found out, he went up on Mount Gerizim and spoke a fable and a curse on Abimelech. I guess God heard the curse because he set the lords of Shechem against Abimelech. The lords found a new hero in Gaal and wined him and dined him and they made fun of their king to the dismay of Zebul who told Abimelech.

He didn’t take being made the fool too well and he ambushed the city at night, then in the fields in the morning, and when the lords all gathered in the Tower of Shechem, Abimelech and his men built a fire at the base and killed everyone inside. The remaining lords and people of Shechem closed themselves in a tower in the middle of the city, so he planned on burning it too.

A woman threw a millstone at Abimelech and crushed his skull, but before he could die, he had a young man who carried his armor run him through with his sword because he didn’t want people to say that he got killed by a woman because that’s humiliating. Anyway, here we are reading the story of how Abimelech got killed by a woman.

Deuteronomy Chapter 31

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Moses is now 120 years old and can’t get around much anymore. I wonder if a mobility scooter would help? He tells Israel not to be afraid because God is going to precede them into the promised land and destroy the nations that are there. We get another reminder that he did the same in earlier chapters to other kings. Also, he reminds Israel that he will not be crossing with them because way back when he hit a rock with his staff and that was an affront to God. Talk about holding grudges. Then he announces, again, that Joshua will be leading them across the Jordan.

So, after announcing that there will be bloodshed and violence and a new guy at the helm, it only makes sense to talk about the law again. Every seven years, at the festival of booths, all of the people will be brought together and the law will be read in its entirety. This is so that the people will hear it and fear God. I really hope that they have the law written down in an easy-to-read place instead of having to go through these past four books where the laws are just carelessly strewn about.

God calls Moses and Joshua, the new guy, to the tent of meeting to tell them that after Moses dies, which will be soon, that the Israelites will start turning to other gods and they will notice that God isn’t there defending them. So, like any 1980’s afterschool special, Moses is told to write a song and teach it to the people so that they won’t forget.

24When Moses had finished writing down in a book the words of this law to the very end, 25Moses commanded the Levites who carried the ark of the covenant of the LORD…”

Bibles, Harper . NRSV Bible with the Apocrypha (p. 492). Zondervan. Kindle Edition.

OK, good news: there is a book of laws. Bad news: it’s with the Ark of the Covenant which likely doesn’t exist, or it’s in a secret government warehouse. Anyway, he tells the Levites that they’re stubborn and rebellious and that he is going to teach him the new song he just wrote. I read ahead, it’s no Lennon and McCartney collab, it’s more like something Jim Steiman would write. Just picture it sung by Meatloaf.

Deuteronomy Chapter 25

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Here we go again, another chapter of laws that are seemingly made up on the spot. If God (or a god) wrote this book, wouldn’t it be a bit more organized. As it is, the Bible is mess Imagine having to reference a law in the text without the internet. Anyway, let’s get going.

The first section deals with litigation in which the person in the wrong is deserving of flogging. If he is found guilty, then he will be lashed in front of the one that he had the dispute with. He will receive forty lashes, but no more because that would be degrading.

Now this where things go off the rails because now we jump to marriage… but first…. verse four:

4You shall not muzzle an ox while it is treading out the grain.

Bibles, Harper . NRSV Bible with the Apocrypha (p. 475). Zondervan. Kindle Edition.

Why? What is the rhyme or reason to this verse being here? According to the Oxford commentary, this verse probably should have gone with Deut. 24:19-20 since it’s discussing agriculture. You’d think some scribe would have figured that out. Anyway, let’s move on.

This chapter started off typical for marriage in the Bible. If brothers live together and one dies, without having a son, his brother will “know his dead brother’s wife” and her firstborn will take the name of her deceased husband. Basically, the woman us passed along as property. Then things take a turn and left me chuckling by the end.

If the brother doesn’t want his brother’s wife (she has no say, obviously) then she’ll tell the elders at the gate and if the brother confirms this, then the widow will pull off his sandal, spit in his face, and declare that he is the one who won’t build up his brother’s house. This is where I chuckled, this family will forever be known as “The house of him whose sandal was pulled off. ” I’m sure it sounds better in Hebrew. There is no mention if the other (living) brother is married himself. It’s not that it matters in this book. I also wonder if that name at the end has been carried down to present day. Just wondering.

Now for more, various laws that could have been better organized. First, if a wife intervenes to help her husband in the a fight by grabbing his assailants junk, her hand will be cut off. Then there’s a low about only carrying honest weights and measures, obviously referring to doing honest commerce. And then there’s the final paragraph. I’m going to include in its entirety.

17Remember what Amalek did to you on your journey out of Egypt, 18how he attacked you on the way, when you were faint and weary, and struck down all who lagged behind you; he did not fear God. 19Therefore when the LORD your God has given you rest from all your enemies on every hand, in the land that the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance to possess, you shall blot out the remembrance of Amalek from under heaven; do not forget.

Bibles, Harper . NRSV Bible with the Apocrypha (p. 476). Zondervan. Kindle Edition.

OK, remember Amalek so that you can forget Amalek. Also, let’s write it in a book so that you can be reminded to remember that you have to forget him. Don’t forget. Or do forget. I forget which.